5 Cheap (And Simple) AF Halloween Costume Ideas That Totally Don’t Suck
If you’re broke (sorry about that), then you’re probably freaking out about Halloween’s impending date and wondering what the fuck you can be besides a homeless person and/or naked. Or a naked homeless person. Actually that sounds fun. Fuck this article, do that. But just in case you’re in full anti-summer body mode (sorry about that too) Below, 5 cheap halloween costume ideas that actually aren’t terrible. If you squint your eyes and try not to think about it.
PS stop being poor.
1. A Ghost
Look. This fun and flirty lady just put a white sheet over her head, poked some eye holes in it, and popped on a pair of red heels. She might be miserable and regretful underneath all that white linen, but no one will ever know.
2. A Mummy
Got 10 bucks to spend at the fabric store? Cool. By 10 bucks worth of white fabric, then tear it to shreds and wrap it around your person. Then cry because you just spent your last 10 dollars on fabric that you fucked up real quick and cannot return.
3. Red Riding Hood
The only thing you really need to pull off a Red Riding Hood costume is a red hood and a look of fear in your eyes. The former, you can fashion out of fabric. The latter takes years and years of wolves fucking you over.
4. Where’s Waldo?
For a Waldo costume, you just need to procure a red and white striped sweater, which you can probably find anywhere. (Try Sears?) After you get the sweater, just make sure you are unable to be found all night. This is an ideal costume for you if you actually don’t want to go anywhere.
TEXT FROM A FRIEND: Where are you? Someone dressed up as Ken Boner. (He’s a dick with a red sweater lololol get it?) Shit is lliiiiiittt.
YOU: I’m Waldo. Come find me!
Joke’s on those losers.
5. Frida Kahlo
Sounds totally random, but it’s inventive and kind of progressive to go as a homely person (think Charlize Theron’s Academy Award win for ). Plus, Frida Kahlo was irrational and incredibly talented, which are two things that anyone should aspire to be, any night of the year.
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